Parenting

Parents Who Raise ‘Confident, Smart, Empathetic’ Kids Do These 5 Things When Their Child Is Misbehaving

Parents Who Raise 'Confident, Smart, Empathetic' Kids Do These 5 Things When Their Child Is Misbehaving

As a parent, one of the most impactful things you can do is recognize your children’s accomplishments and healthy habits. This is when you put your empathy muscles to work encouraging good behavior, self-confidence, and self-esteem in your children.

It’s important to accept, however, that no one is born perfect—your child will end up making bad choices. It’s how you handle and react to the situation that determines whether or not they’ll make better decisions and develop healthy habits in the future.

Here’s what parents who raise confident, intelligent, and empathetic children do when their children are well-behaved:

1. They focus on their child’s behavior

It is better to compliment specific behaviors than to compliment the child as a whole. It’s the difference between saying “You’re such a good boy!” and “You did a great job putting your toys back in the locker!”

This way children are not always under the microscope of being classified as “good” or “bad” children. They are criticized for their behaviors, which can be changed to meet expectations.

The other side of the coin should be fairly obvious: it is better to criticize the behavior of children than to criticize the child as a person.

For example, you would say, “I didn’t like you hitting your little brother. It wasn’t a good thing to do,” rather than saying, “You’re a bad brother.

We hope the children will conclude that there are better options to consider in the future. We know and they know that they are capable of better choices.

2. They use guilt, not shame

3. They build their self-esteem

Grant recommends that before toddlers become preschoolers, we should ask them to be helpers. Involving your children in your daily chores gives them compassion for themselves and makes them feel like they have something meaningful to offer.

You can reinforce your child’s identity by asking questions such as “Will you be a sharer?” A caregiver? A caring person? Can you play with your little brother for 10 minutes to help mom?

I wish I had done this with my kids when they were little. By the time I started asking for help at home when they were about nine years old, it was too late. There were fights because they weren’t used to helping at all.

Learn from my mistake: start asking for help with simple tasks at an early stage.

4. They discuss emotions

5. They avoid corruption